Okay so now it is my time to be depressed, it seems everyone i know or love is getting depressed......
I know why i am depressed, but why is everyone else.....no one will tell me... its just like my poem; Life isn't fair..... i hate me, my life, and most of all i hate my body... i am soo fat, and don't say i am not.... if you do say im not fat you are so lying!!! But i love you for it!!!!
okay, i am really worried that Michael will kill himself. id want him to, but will he listen to me??? he has been depressed latley and idk what to do to help him.... what should I do.... i am trying to understand, but he won't tell me anything... i feel like i am being locked out of his life.
Oh, and we stopped being friends for two whole blocks and i hated it even though it was my dicision.
Okay the mil' ball was awsome, but my heart was kinda breaking b/c everyone including me thought Michael liked Beth!!!!!!!!!!!!! And ya know what when i asked him he didn't say nay or yeh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!lol! I am soo confused!!!!!!!!!!!!! I really kinda confused b/c there is this guy Alex and then there is Kp!!! (Michael!) I love Michael, but he doesn't like me!!!!!!!!!!!! And Alex is soo sweet and we danced almost every song!!!!!!! lol! He is really nice!
Now i think Michael is avoiding and not talking to me........... but idk!!! I am so confused, and idk why!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I love him, but he doesn't
Okay so i am slowly coming back to normal. Yay!!!!! And thankz ev.body for all your support and I love y'all sooooo much!!!!!!!!
Ummmm.... whell i got more news, my effing new Doctor told me that i might be put back into the hostpital, if i don't start eating.......... but the thing is, I am eating!!!!!!!!!!!! Whell, I am eating enough ( I think!!!! lol!) I mean is it that big of a deal if I don't eat lunch or breakfast, i eat dinner!!!!!!!!!!!
Everything I say,
everyone of the sun's rays,
just pulls me deeper and deeper in this fray.
You say i can do it,
but the shoe just doesn't fit,
and all of my hopes and dreams are filling up this pit.
Don't you see I just want to be outta here.
everything I see I fear,
I wanna go back to that place, that for me is just empty space,
Don't you see,
this isn't the true me,
and that I just wanna be free.
Don't you see the emotions i can't feel,
and the person you see isn't really real,
And can't you hear me trying to break the seal????