Just few thoughts I'd like to complain about...

I’m recently spending some time working out of town and went on travel from destination to destination and it has been 4 months I spend most of my time working on my industrial supplies business. it’s been 4 months since my last taste of competitive bodybuilding. Sometime it strikes me as strange that you have guys who will probably never make it to the very top of the bodybuilding world to make a significant income, yet will spend thousands to get there, sometimes ruining their health in the process. What is the motivation for these guys?

I think one of the reasons, from an Asian American perspective is that everybody in the U.S. thinks they can become anything. They say here on TV that if you want it badly enough you can just do it. So a lot of these people are dreamers and will do it for five, ten, fifteen years. They will move to Venice, California and live in little trailer parks and eat tuna all day and go to Gold’s Gym, Venice, and think that one day they will make it and somebody will discover them. They will become a movie star or an extra or whatever. And they think they can do it so much even if they lack the genetics or any kind of other capabilities. As people know, America is known to be the land of possibilities, of borderless possibilities. And those people think if Arnold can come from Austria and make it, they think since they are already in America they should be able to make it. And this is the American dream, which can definitely become the American nightmare.

As I mentioned before some bodybuilders live in trailer park (actually 95% of them are in the poverty line), there’s a statement I’d like to make here. Mr. B still owes me money (yes fucktard you know who you are), $1175 dollars. I loaned him money to buy anabolic steroids because at the time, he was getting kicked outta his parent’s house and he was out of money. So I loaned him the money so he could buy his drugs so he could compete. But he never gave me the money back. Later he was telling people that he paid me back by providing me with steroid knowledge. First of all this is wrong: he never gave me any knowledge because he would get all his knowledge from me. He likes to be one of these guys who are always scam around for free favors.

On top of all these negative perspectives,  why I’m so in love with this? I don’t know. I like the fact that definitely you can’t buy it. Otherwise everyone would buy 30 pounds of back and shoulders, 15 pounds of muscles for this and that body part. If you buy a nice BMW or Mercedes you must park it in front of the house or building. You can only take the key with you. But a built body can be taken anywhere. And as a bodybuilder you definitely like to look different compared to others. Piercing’s, tattoos, changing hairstyles and hair colors can all be done by paying for it. You just can’t expect to go to a store and ask to buy 50lbs of muscles on your frame. A great body is not built overnight. It takes many, many years of sacrifice outside of the gym and self-torture in the gym, and also when it comes to eating healthy (not just junk) and controlling your appetite in the pre contest phase when you are getting ready for a show; you are then eating for shape and not for satisfying your appetite.

It’s very important for bodybuilders to have someone supportive on their side. It is difficult to live with a competitive bodybuilder, especially a national level competitor who has to put all their time and energy into the sport. What is also very difficult for the female in such a relationship is that all the attention is on the guy and, not like in most “normal” relationships where it is on the female. Bodybuilders are basically male beauty queens who require more work than the average guy. When I was living with my ex, she cooks most of my meals from ground up and make sure it has sufficient proteins, carbs, fibers and low fat for 3 years. For my career I had the best possible understanding, support, help and I do not know anybody else who will do that or would be doing that. I didn’t realize how much effort it takes until I start to do everything myself, cooking is a real bitch.

Recently I’m taking a step back from bodybuilding and re-assessing my life. In other sports like football, basketball, baseball, soccer, at least the crippled and sick ones are getting health benefits and financial advice and at least money so that they are financially secure to the end of their days. The lack of a steady income source and lack of enough reimbursement for the results of the athletes hardest work in bodybuilding has driven plenty of these people into illegal, unethical and dangerous activities. Also after 11 years I’m a little fed up with this. Being in this game for at least 11 years is definitely not something to enjoy on a daily basis. As a bodybuilder you must have your uniform (your body) on 24/7. And as a doctor or prosecutor or as a police officer you can take your uniform off after work and you are not all the time exposed to 24/7 talk about bodybuilding, shows, protein, and drugs, anywhere and anytime of the day.

And after all these years, it is not good being a target for bodybuilding questions, interviews and basically talks everywhere from grocery stores to nightclubs/bars at one o’clock in the morning where people are asking me for diet or training routines. Or I go to a Chinese restaurant in Flushing and they pull up a chair, take a seat and ask me what kind of drugs should they take to look like me. People often ask me at 1:00 am in a bar for a workout routine, a diet routine, a drug program; like I really want to talk about my job 24/7.For the past 10 years I have encounter near 100 people who asked me if I could get for them this or that drug - I even made a list and wrote the names of these people down. They do not care if they are asking you for illegal favors either and they do not care if you ended up behind bars for that. It is all about them.One thing I'd like to mention here, on this forum, yes here on EBABY. There's a guy send me a message regarding to how to pack on muscles without taking proteins because he doesn't like to eat bodybuilding type of foods. what he was saying is he's actually asking me what kind of drugs should he use so he doesn't have to train and eat that hard. This is wrong, this is something I like the most about bodybuilding: there's no short cut, if you are not willing to sacrifice like one of us, this sports isn't for you, go play soccer or tennis instead.

Most of my friends are your average Joe Schmoe who never touch a dumbell in their whole life. And personally I do not like to go out in bodybuilder groups because there is mostly - but not always - too much talk about proteins, shows, the newest drugs and most of the bodybuilders do not have too many social skills and additional money to go to the place I like to go.

In most cases bodybuilders are just drug addicts - nothing more, nothing less. It’s not to put myself above them; it’s just how it is.  Only the top IFBB pros like Jay, Dexter, Ronnie Coleman get to make millions/year from those big fat endorsement, most of the average pros don’t even have a contract and bum off his mothers basement and beg for a bag of groceries. An average national level bodybuilder spend about $1500/month alone on drugs, and another $1500 on groceries during the pre contest preparation. The average income in this nation is about $2000/month. So what happen when you really want something and you can’t afford? people start to conduct in illegal activities. From what I have heard, some bodybuilders sell drugs, dance in male strip clubs, some even sell themself as an escort regardless the gender of the customers. For example, IFBB Pro bodybuilder Kai Greene, he’s living in a project at Flat Bush Brooklyn and he takes bus and train to the gym, he doesn’t even own a car. Fortunate enough, I own a decent import/export business which enables me to support myself and bodybuilding lifestyle and not have to worry about money for the expenses(but sometime i still do feel the pain for spending so much cash on foods and supplements). At my last show, a rep from a brand name supplement company approach me backstage and tell me if I win my next show, they will offer me a sponsorship contract. Even until now, I still don’t think I ‘ll compete because of money, I love the discipline, the lifestyle and respect it gets me. I can care less about that contract (although that'll be great, who doesn't like to have extra $$ on the side) I have my import/export business to brings in cash, this is all about the love of the game.