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When we begin to think that we can plan and control our life, it seems Somebody laughs at us. Our life can go upside down for seconds, and it doesn't depend on our will. All our live has been already prescribed and decided. People say "Once destiny has been decided it cannot be changed."

What is destiny?

Whom is destiny made?

Can we change our destiny?

How can we change our destiny?

Hi Lela.

If I’m not mistaken, many people during our world’s history have tried to link their histories to some kind of idea they call destiny. Whether it was the Romans, looking for signs of the future through auguries or the Méxica, trying to make sense of their world by believing that time would end and start anew after about 52 years; whether you take the Catholics with their fear of hell and their concept of original sin (as long as purgatory is still the prime institution that fills me with fear) or the Puritans with their Calvinistic idea of predestination. And how often did we have to hear somebody say that it’s not his fault that he was the way he was, but somebody else’s; be it society or religion or … well you name it. All of these notions call for a basic After all, it seems that sticking to the concept of destiny or predestination is an easy way of getting rid of the nagging feeling of responsibility. When there’s no logical reason anymore to explain your choice, you can always fall back on your concept of destiny. “That’s the way it is; c’est la vie, da kann man nichts machen.” It sounds so passive, so fatalistic, so pathetic, and so definitely not what our world seems to be about. This is particularly true for situations in which quick and rational decisions are needed to make a change. It’s you whose knowledge is needed or you whose looks could save the day. Your abilities predestine you for a certain path in life.

How can you change your destiny or the way you chose? It seems you can only do so by taking responsibility for what you do or for who you are and by being mindful of your choices. How can you learn how to do it well? You must have something like a positively predestined fate to be without mistakes. Sadly, making mistakes is not considered among the features of showing responsibility. How are we to learn then? It seems that there’s a dilemma, which opens the door for the theory of predestination again. Making predestined mistakes would then be much less bad than under “full-responsibility” conditions than making mistakes without the soothing exit of some higher law. Does destiny then mean a mitigation of that dreaded and ever-nagging responsibility for yourself and for the world around you? Isn’t that a task too much for one woman or one man? Let’s hope that Nietzsche was wrong then…

Cheers, Ixion.

do u have heard a song called <beautiful boy>?

life is what happens to u ,when u are busying with other plans.i always told myself that dont believe the destiny,dont dream to get very much from others.

if  u want to reach something,just do it!work on yourself

Hi sir how r u?I look for a woman but I don't know if I'll find her  plz give me one

Hi Ixion and luobin..&! Thank you for your opinion. Yes, you are right we should be in charge  for what we do and people we live with.

How easy would our life be if  for beeing responsible, honest and decent people, life, destiny or higher law, whatever, be tolerate with us and don't give us chalenges, sometimes seems unlogical ( We are so nice. Why?), cruel and unfair. Though I have strong opinion nothig send us undersevedly.

Maybe we shouldn't be too nice ….

There is one word in our word in all languages-"suddenly". This word appear in my life, when I begin to think I control my life, because I don't do anything wrong, I am so nice, what can happened to me. Suddenly…and I feel myself  the blind tiny in front of destiny or higher law or, whatever. It is why I never plan my life. 

I appreciate you again for sharing your thoughts.

Yes, Lela, I guess I know what you meant.  Everything is going on, and same our life, suddenly, just all of a sudden, our life is turning upside down, we need to strive so hard to get it through, for the situtations we can't stand, the most acceptable way is to blame it on destiny.  Maybe it can make us feel better for a while, but then again, we often fall in the cyle of taking pity on ourselves, feeling sad, and stopping trying to work hard to fix the issues we are encountering. 

My parents are both close to 70, their marriage life was not so good, but in our eyes, the life was OK.  Suddenly, my dad decided to leave the house for a woman he just knew for a few months.  He even sued the divorce this past April, though rejected by the court.  We have no idea where he is now (just guess he is living with the woman in another city). My mom could not face this, she cried every time when she called me…I tried to talk her out of the sad mood.  She once told me during one fortune-teller's visit, she was told that they could not live to old age in conjugal bliss…I knew she was so sad that she could not understand why this darn thing happened, and destiny is the best reason to explain all that. 

I begged her to face this, and tried to find a new way to spend her retired life, I know it is not easy, and saying is saying…but she has to…otherwise even my dad is away, she was and is going to be haunted with gloomy thoughts and sad memories…I said being happy or unahppy is up to her, let him go or not….my mom used to live a simple happy life, and I wish she can recover her life soon…I love her, and I am trying my best to give her my support…

Stay happy…Sherry

hi,Lela.my gf just said goodbye to me last week,so is it the destiny for me?

you didn't ask me bu i want to answer your question tony chan! sometime we are isteem somebody but s/he is unworthiness! everything is destiny and nothing isn't because we can chose what we will do or won't do! and when we chose we are responsible  from our life. therefore life is a election. i hope you will chose right one everytime!

Hi lela,

I really interested in reading all the thoughts in your topic.

I do believe in destiny, sometimes your are planning to control your life in someways but suddenly everything comes opposite bcoz something you did not consider has happened. It may change your live positively or negatively

let's take an e.g : your are walking in the road and suddenly a car crashed you ..  or let say u have an exam tommrrow and suddenly you got a flue and you cannot attend the exam bcoz you are so sick. Another example is ( someone got a sudden heart shock and dies ) . . this is destiny.. when things comes suddenly and opposite to what you are planning

 sometimes destiny comes positively, for example : when you fall in love with someone .. it is destiny ..

i hope you got the idea ;p 

at the end i can say that ( although destiny is existing, we have to striveas much as we can to build and change our live, destiny will not stop our dreams )

Your destiny is your life that you have to face by your faith. Your God create you and the world around you. He gave you the strength to walk with confidence. You must not regret for every mistake you make. You just need to solve it or to face it, nothing going to stop you but yourself. So, again be confident and you'll find that life is worth to live.