TA n. 1. Short for thanks
TABLOID n. 1. A term used to describe several of the national newspapers, specifically THE SUN, THE DAILY STAR, THE DAILY MIRROR, THE DAILY EXPRESS, THE MORNING STAR (the socialist paper) and THE DAILY MAIL. A TABLOID'S page is small (being approximately one-half the page size of a standard newspaper). They are characterised by outlandish, sensationalist headlines at the slightest whim of news. The TABLOIDS were especially active during the Falklands crisis (although real news is not a prerequisite for a TABLOID). The TABLOIDS are very popular and competition is fierce among them for readers. THE SUN and the DAILY STAR sport a bare breasted BIRD to keep the readers attention (should the reader get bored with the shallow amount of information in the rest of the paper). The DAILY MAIL has been distancing itself (in respectability) from the other TABLOIDS and more closely approximates a newspaper. See also PAGE THREE and FLEETSTREET.The Times: Read by the people who run the country. Daily Mirror: Read by the people who think they run the country. Guardian: Read by the people who think they ought to run the country. Morning Star: Read by the people who think the country ought to be run by another country. Daily Mail: Read by the wives of the people who own the country. Financial Times: Read by the people who own the country. Daily Express: Read by the people who think that the country ought to be run as it used to be. Daily Telegraph: Read by the people who think it still is. The Sun: Their readers don't care who runs the country as long as she has big tits.
TAKES THE BISCUIT phrase. 1. Equivalent to "That beats everything"
TANNER n. 1. Obsolete term for six old PENCE.
TANNOY n. 1. A public address system, from Tannoy, a British loudspeaker manufacturer. v. 1. To page on a public address system, as in, "You ought to 'ave 'im TANNOYED." (To which one pundit thought, "He should've been here, but his crime wasn't so heinous that he should be TANNOYED!")
TARMAC n. 1. Blacktop. The word is derived from an 18th century engineer and road builder by the name of John Macadam.
TART v. 1. To "spruce up", make improvements to, as in, "We just tarted up the place a bit."
TEA n. 1. A very common hot beverage found in the UK. It is usually served with a generous portion of milk to mask the flavor of the TEA. 2. A light meal in the late afternoon at which one drinks TEA or coffee, but not wine or spirits. A meal held later in the evening (e.g. 8 p.m.) is definitely not TEA, regardless of what you drink or how light the meal may be. There is a class connotation attached to this word. The working class tend to call the evening meal TEA, while the middle class call it 'dinner'. The meal taken around midday is called 'lunch' by the middle classes and 'dinner' by the working class.
TEACAKE n. 1. A kind of sweetened bread with raisins, often served toasted. There are lots of CAKES like this: BATH BUNS, CHELSEA BUNS and ECCLES CAKES.
Breads come in many varieties also, such as: BAPS, BRIDGE ROLLS, FINGER ROLLS and COTTAGE LOAF.
TEA TOWEL n. 1. Dish towel.
TEE SHIRT n. 1. Short sleeved sports shirt.
TELLY n. 1. A television, not a telephone.
TERRACE HOUSE n. 1. Row house. Town house.
THEATRE n. 1. An establishment where one may see plays, ballet etc. This is most certainly not a place to see movies.
THE CITY n. 1. London's equivalent to Wall Street. When visiting London avoid routes signposted to THE CITY unless you are trying to get lost.
THREE PENCE (thrup-pen-ss) n. 1. An obsolete coin worth three old PENCE.
TICK MARK n. 1. A small mark made by a teacher along side every correct answer. If your children come home with TICK MARKS all over their papers, its good. Its the X's (crosses) you need to be concerned about.
TIGHTS n. 1. Hosiery, nylons or even tights.
TIMBER YARD n. 1. Lumber yard.
TIME GENTLEMEN PLEASE phrase. 1. Standard request for customers to leave drink up and leave the PUB. Anyone serving or buying a drink after TIME is breaking the law. In liberated PUBS you may hear "TIME LADIES AND GENTLEMEN PLEASE".
TIN n. 1. Can, as in "a TIN of fruit". 2. Pan, as in "a cake TIN".
TIP adj. 1. Mess, as in, "The room was all in a TIP". n. 1. Dump, as in a "rubbish TIP".
TIPPER LORRY n. 1. Dump truck.
TIPPLE v. 1. To drink, often accompanied with a motion of the wrist to suggest its meaning, as in, "What's your TIPPLE ?".
TISSUE n. 1. Kleenex.
TOAD IN THE HOLE n. 1. Sausages in YORKSHIRE PUDDING.
TOGGED UP/OUT v. 1. To be all dressed up, as in, "He was TOGGED OUT in top hat and tails".
TOGS n. 1. Clothes, as in SWIMMING TOGS.
TOMATO SAUCE (toe-mah-toe sah-ss) n. 1. Ketchup.
TOMBOLA (tom-bole-ah) n. 1. A raffle as might be found at a FETE.
TOMMY BAR n. 1. Crow bar. A straight bar used to lever something.
TON n. 1. Twenty HUNDREDWEIGHT (2240 pounds). 2. One hundred. Often 100 mph or 100 POUNDS sterling. Road signs reading "MAX 10 TONS" are however weight limits, not speed limits. To the passive American driver who is accustomed to 55 mph, it seems that the speed limit really is 10 TONS.
TONSILITIS n. 1. Strep throat.
TORCH n. 1. Flash light.
TOTTER n. 1. A refuse collector who picks over collected rubbish for anything which is salable. A now almost extinct version of a TOTTER is a RAG AND BONE MAN. He usually drives a horse and cart and collects household items. Often he would give the children a goldfish or balloon in return for items they would bring to him.
TOTTING UP v. 1. To add up.
TRAFFICATORS n. 1. Directional signals. The term was actually used to describe small "arms" on the outside of a vehicle which would flip out indicating the direction one wished to turn. This term has fallen into disuse since the British car industry has modernized.
TRAMP n. 1. A vagrant. 2. A hooker.
TRANSPORT CAFE (trans-port caff) n. 1. Truck stop.
TREACLE n. 1. A molasses-like sweet syrup. If this is very dark it is known as BLACK TREACLE. Light colored syrup is known as GOLDEN SYRUP.
TREETS n. 1. M and M's which are all the same colour.
TRENDY adj. 1. Fashionable, with perhaps a somewhat derogatory connotation. Only people who aren't TRENDY, would use the term.
TRIFLE (try-fle) n. 1. A layered dessert of custard, jello, sherry, fruit and sponge cake.
TROLLEY n. 1. Cart, as in a shopping cart or TEA TROLLEY.
TROUSERS n. 1. Pants.
TUBE n. 1. The London subway system.
TURNING n. 1. Turn (when giving directions) as in, "Its the third TURNING on the right".
TURN-UPS n. 1. Pant cuffs.
TWEE adj. 1. Prissey, as in, a "TWEE hat" or "TWEE joke".TWO PENCE (tup-pen-ss) n. 1. Not a coin worth two old PENCE, but simply a term for two PENCE.