livid

i can be surrounded by a sea of people,but still felt being left all alone

i appear to have many friends in my life,but most of them are table friendship which will soon change if i get into trouble.

We meet in annual holiday and have a good time when we get together.in ordinary ways,we left our numbers after the activity, which was expected to enhance the relationship between each other.

But the most ridiculous thing is after a short time, i barely even remember that their numbers have already stored in my cell phone.

It feel so useless cuz i would never make a call to them until next gathering.
For me,this is one kind of sorrow.

Only very few of my friends are ture friends.i call them "bosom buddy".They are those who i don't hang out regularly.But whenever i need a haven,they are the kind i always think first.

i used to get several bosom buddies,but as time goes by we are not in touch as often as before.i meant to chat with them but somehow i didn't know how to begin.

Maybe i just never relize that i need to grab it and cherish it. It seems one thing has been true all along, you never know what you've got till it's gone.
Anyways without them i'll definately feel lonely and solitary,at least at that time.

After an amicable split i feel like i am waiting for someone ,someone who can make me dare to look back and open my heart again
Sometimes the incident seemed very close,sometimes far away.when i'm about to reach it ,suddently disappear.

Though i'm a 100% practical man, there are some reasons make me want to live in fantacy: realism is cruel,sometimes the fate is in our hand ,but we can do nothing.
i won't make any promise cuz things won't change without taking actions

May u guys would not feel sick of my nonsense talk,cuz i'm a really mood unstable fellow.i gotta write it down cuz my blog ain't gonna write itself.

best wishes

Seth