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December 13, 2007

What goes around comes around. That's karma, right? When I hit rock bottom it got me thinking. Is this all the hurt that I have caused other people coming back to me? I never meant to cause them pain. I just thought it's what's supposed to be done.

 

Am I being given a sign? When I have been crying day after day after day, was that a sign? Maybe I have been given subtle signs. But when I wasn't doing anything about them, I was given a really big one I would surely not miss. But what are these signs for? Should I have tried even harder to make things work even when it already seemed hopeless? I tried but my efforts were futile. At the end of the day, my heart was screaming that it didn't feel right anymore. Should I have tried harder?

 

I am not sad that it didn't work out. I guess it really wasn't supposed to. I was much better off and happier than I've ever been. So I wouldn't change anything. But what happened after that time of bliss is something that got me thinking. Why did it have to hurt so bad? Why couldn't it have stayed just like that? I know people go through things for reasons. This last year has been wonderful for me because I have always put all my faith in people and really believed in love. I fought for something that I felt strongly about. I believed that something could work even when there were a lot who didn't. I don't ever want to lost that spirit.

 

Most importantly, though, the last year has given me the perspective to really take care of myself. This is difficult because all those times, I didn't really think about myself. I was happy and contented with that. Being with someone and giving my all so that the relationship would work, was for me also thinking and taking care of myself. But things went wrong.

 

Heartache will not stop me from finding love again. I still believe that it's better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.

04:24 PM Dec 13 2007

nanxue

nanxue
China

nice to meet you again!miss you very much.don`t be so sad,dear sister!

More entries: What Goes Around Comes Around (1), Christmas At Home, I Should Be Closing Doors And Windows (1), News Of His Coming Home (2), Another Thanksgiving (2), Some Marriages Just Don't Work Out (2), The Day The Subject Changed, Can We Change Our Destiny?, One Of My Pricest Possessions, The Notebook

View all entries >

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46

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Philippines

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I'm a chemistry babe who ended up in the call center industry who is also a Tagalog and English tutor partime!:)

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University of the Philippines, Diliman

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BS Chemistry

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