HuangYe

Recently I found a place where could cover my lonesome for a while with meaningless conversation. It’s a bar of a local hostel which will takes me half hour to get. For the person like me who would like to spend the rest of his life on the road and have spent a quarter of will feel no surprise that not every traveler in the hostel would genuinely to talk to you. I don’t wanna deny some friendship and romantic stories had truly happened there, but for me if not in the mid of my claustrophobic days the only thing I want to do is just lips some liquor.

I met a Chinese young dude couple days ago right in the bar who impressed me a lot, not because his funny English but his ideas about Americans, from which I bet half Chinese younkers strongly admire the life we got regardless the low economic situation we have right now especially while a lot of westerns thinking Americans are noting but a bunch of cureless idiots.

During the conversation with him I did want to be regarded as a Chinese guy, but my effort to him seems non-senses. “What’s the matter with you? You’re an American, you speak English, and every Chinese girl wants to get married with Americans!” he yelled at me.

No, I’m not at least in China, and that’s why I’m here, hoping to be accepted instead of being taken as an outsider. I felt pretty sad about his words, I don’t know what’s hell of reasons caused the sea change in the Chinese mind, once they were the strongest nation in the world and I’d admit that they’re still the stronger one but lack of self-confidence in the mid of globalization, especially when you talking to them, the self-esteem is weak.

“There’s noting we could do about it” as my father said this morning, Chinese people needs to be challenged, not just the whole nation nor the large country but also the individual, which could be far more important than ever.