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Used To Do vs. Be Used To

Date: Feb 18 2011

Themes: Family

Grammar: Used to Do vs Be Used to


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We don’t always have a lot in common with our relatives, or even particularly like them. But we have to love them and try to get along with them, because we’re related to them. That’s just the way family works.

When you get married, you suddenly have a whole new set of relatives whom you have to try to get along with. In-laws have a bad reputation of being tough to deal with, from the father-in-law who is overprotective of his daughter, to the mother-in-law who criticizes every decision her son’s wife makes.

Amy is about to get married, and she’s a little nervous about having in-laws. Dale has been married for five years, so he can give her some advice.



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Amy:  Do you have the situation that I’m beginning to have of having to deal not only with your own family but also with in-laws?

Dale:  Yes. I actually have in-laws that are from another city who’s coming into town, and I’m kind of excited about it. But you know, I’ve been with my wife for almost five years, so I’ve gotten used to the in-laws. But at first, it was a bit tough.

Amy:  Really, so do you and your mother-in-law and father-in-law have stuff in common?

Dale:  No.

Amy:  You don’t?

Dale:  No. But, I mean, she’s really sweet. But I think that I grew up differently, with a lot of culture, because I’m Philippino. So I don’t think they understand me that much, and in the reverse, I can’t understand them.

Amy:  Did your…when you met your wife’s father, did he give you the third degree or anything, like that cliche?

Dale:  Yeah.

Amy:  But you survived.

Dale:  Yep. And how about you, you’ve met your in-laws already?

Amy:  Future in-laws, yes.

Dale:  And they’re really nice?

Amy:  His mom and I are two peas in a pod.

Dale:  Well, there you go. There you go.


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Dale has been married for five years. Amy asks him about his relationship with his wife’s parents. He likes his in-laws and gets along pretty well with them, even though he doesn’t have a lot in common with them.

Dale has a very different background from his wife’s family. He is from the Philippines, and they are from the U.S. That makes it harder for them to understand one another, but they are nice and do their best.

Dale asks Amy about her future in-laws. She says that she and her fiance’s mom are like two peas in a pod. They get along great.

If you are married, do you get along well with your in-laws? If you aren’t married, is it important to you that your future husband or wife get along well with your parents?



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pass by


it is a problem i am about to meet,i really don't know how to deal with that.lots of difficulties,live in diffrent ways,think in diffrent ways.so absolutly we will have diffrent opinions about things.i am not sure of that they will understand me.

02:37 AM Feb 22 2011 |

jerry bourne


i have no girlfriend!how can i get married!

12:42 AM Feb 21 2011 |

Miss Fabulous


what about the other way round? if someone comes into ur family and doesnt want to get adapted or doesnt make even the slightest effort to make herself/himself likeable and lets the old in laws work and do all the stuff that they are actually not supposed to do? the answer is: u cant love them, it s a fucking situation

06:48 PM Feb 20 2011 |



this is real life

we can learn from that 

03:46 PM Feb 20 2011 |



Iran, Islamic Republic Of

I'm not married yet,at first I have to finish my studing

"Of course it's important for me that my future wife will get along well with my parents.

and also I"ll get along with her parents too 

01:43 PM Feb 20 2011 |



Viet Nam

I think it's of the role essence to get along well with your in-laws. Though I'm not married but if I were in Dale's position, I'd do the same. And I believe so long as you really try to be more outgoing with them, you'll make the atmosphere more comfortable. Or else, it'll be very awkward. 

10:45 AM Feb 20 2011 |



Russian Federation

Of course it's better to get along. It's not very good to have conflict between people who are close to you.

07:32 PM Feb 19 2011 |



Iran, Islamic Republic Of

hi u know it was terrific lesson ,u know i am single now and i am worrying about my future ,u know becuase i wana find korean or american partner and i think my parents will be dissagree with me ,i really pray for this that my parents agree and try to get along with my in law,

thx about this full of experiences

"dont lost ur hope from god's mercy" it will help u

07:01 PM Feb 19 2011 |

Tila Tequila

United States

nice lesson!:_*

05:49 PM Feb 19 2011 |



Saudi Arabia

nice lesson, i like to say emy you have good luck you get mother in law cooperating .

03:20 PM Feb 19 2011 |



any relation ships are built on trust

02:35 PM Feb 19 2011 |

Najwa Al-harthi

Saudi Arabia

great lesson !!  i don't know if my future husband will get along with my parents or not !!   cause it's not my problem lol 

l just hope to get along with his mom cause this is the real problem !

08:34 AM Feb 19 2011 |



I´ve been pretty happy with my wife because we don´t use to be in touch with our in-laws  we live in our own apartment, grow our kids, of course we have friends, I think it is better to count on friends first than in relatives

06:56 AM Feb 19 2011 |



I’m married, I get along with my in-laws not well but not bad. it’s ok, because the culture of my in-laws and me are different. But I try to get used to the different culture, as the text said, that’s the way family works!!

05:52 AM Feb 19 2011 |

lucas thet naung


Being get along well with parents and relatives from both sides of wife and husband would be a great happiness in family life. I am gonna get married with my beloved fiancee. Problem is that my mom does not agree very much on religion and her mom as well. Anyway, we will be trying to get along well with them.

03:32 AM Feb 19 2011 |



Minor correction. A person who is a citizen of the Philippines is called Filipino not Philippino. :)

02:57 AM Feb 19 2011 |

malak lamrani


wow im not married yet but if i will married some day its important to behave nicely with in-laws and spend a lot of time with them . its some thing i must do it like wife

08:31 PM Feb 18 2011 |



Iran, Islamic Republic Of

it's important for me tha my future husband get along with my parents although i 'am going to leave iran for ever so i think we will rarly see them

08:17 PM Feb 18 2011 |



My father in-law is very kind.

01:47 PM Feb 18 2011 |


Iran, Islamic Republic Of

I’m single but It’s important to me that my future wife get along with my parents,If she doesn’t do that the life will be bad for both of us.
I should do that to about her parents.

01:27 PM Feb 18 2011 |

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