Boundaries

Boundaries

Aug 15 2018

Intro

We’ve all seen the awkward couple on a first date. They sit and ask each other questions during dinner, and then? Will she hold his hand? Will he give her a kiss? It’s hard to know what’s right at the beginning of a relationship.

People who are interested in each other romantically are also attracted to each other physically. But it’s not always OK to touch another person. People have individual boundaries, and it’s important to respect those guidelines. When a relationship first starts, it’s almost always good to take things slowly. Even if the feeling’s mutual, you will probably scare a lot of people off if you try to go too far on the first date.

How do Marni and Jeff approach relationships? Find out what kind of advice Jeff has in this English lesson about dating.

Dialogue

Marni: Jeff, I need some advice.
Jeff: Yeah?
Marni: I started seeing someone, and he’s great, but he just doesn’t respect my boundaries.
Jeff: Boundaries. What are you talking about?
Marni: I just want to feel comfortable and safe with him. I want to take things slowly, and so I think we need to set some boundaries. Set some guidelines for how we’re going to approach things, so we’re all on the same page.
Jeff: Man, you have to be careful with that. That will scare a lot of people off. Me, I just take it as it comes.
Marni: Really? Because I want to take things slowly. I really like this guy, and I want him to respect me. I don’t want him to go too far, or for me to go too far, too soon. So I think we just really need some boundaries.
Jeff: If the feeling’s mutual and everything’s consensual, then I say just act naturally.

Discussion

Marni asks Jeff for dating advice. She has a new boyfriend, but she doesn’t want to become too physically involved with him too early in the relationship. She believes that it’s important to take things slowly and get to know the other person well first.

Jeff thinks that it’s awkward to set boundaries. He likes to follow his feelings and let things happen naturally. He tells Marni that she will scare a lot of people off if she talks too much about boundaries. Although Jeff and Marni are friends, they’re definitely not on the same page when it comes to dating.

What are your rules for dating? Do you set boundaries?

Grammar Point

To, Too, & Two

Talking about her new relationship, Marni says, “I don’t want him to go too far, or for me to go too far, too soon.” She uses two words that sound alike: to and too.

Because to, too, & two all sound the same, people often confuse them. Here are some examples of how to use these words correctly.

To is either used as part of an infinitive (to go, to sing, to do, etc.) or as a preposition (to the store, to Rome, etc.). We use infinitives after certain verbs, like love, like, want or hate. For example, “I want to see a movie tonight,” or, “I hate to study for math tests.” We use to as a preposition when we are talking about where we are going. For instance, “She is going to a party this weekend,” or, “Did you go to the bank today?”

Too is used to talk about the quantity of something (too much, too little, etc.). As an example, “Jeff can’t go with us tonight. He has too much work to do!” In addition, we use too when we mean also. For example, “I like the band Coldplay, too!

Two is used to talk about the number between one and three. For example, “I have two sisters,” or, “There are two tickets left for the concert on Saturday.”

Put the correct word (to, too, two) in this sentence, “Steve is working until 10 tonight, and I will be late for dinner, __.”

Quiz

  1. What doesn’t Marni like about her new boyfriend?

  2. What advice does Jeff give Marni?

  3. Which word or phrase doesn’t belong?

  4. Which sentence is incorrect?


See the full English lesson at English, baby!