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Yu Chen

Yu Chen

Taiwan

July 5, 2011

Thousands of time, I wonder that was my fault.  My mom always stays cool and makes a poker face to me, when I come home. I don't know what I did because she is not happy everytime when she sees me. However, the situation was opposite to my sister, my baby sister. My mom calls her baby when she is home. I try to explain her reaction to my sister that maybe because of my sister is not home and lives in the dom away from home. But, I just can't help feeling sad that why the situation was so opposite. I'm the one who study good university, and graduate, and I'm the one who earn money for living, but eventually I the one nobody care about. Therefore, I start to wonder is it my fault? Do I do anything wrong? Then why my mother doesn't love me?  Last week, I saw a movie "AI". The robot boy, David, said, "Mommy, why don't you love me? Is it because I noy a real human being? ... I were to become a human boy for you if I could." David's mother did not say anything but ran alway. I cried, when I saw this scene. He makes me think of myself. -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------There is another sad thing happened, too. Yesterday, I talked with my friend on Facebook. It was not a pleasant conversation, then. I told her this weekend I will go to Taipei and visit my ralitive. I've told her at the beginngin that I will stay with my family this trip. And also told her the only time we can get together is the time before I met my cusin. But finally, my friend told me that she can't move a time. I think that's ok because I didn't make an appointment to her earlier. After that, we accepted the consequence and said "We can meet  next time." I thought that is only consequce we can take. But thing went worse. My friend started to be unhappy and left some words "I think you go to Taipei for me." I knew she was misunderstanding and I apollogized to her. And, she never responed my words after that.   The two things bother me, now. On the one hand, I don't know what should I do or what can I do. I feel sad because my mom and my friend's displeasant. On the other hand, I think I'm innocent, I didn't do anything to hurt them. But I don't know why I feel so bad whenever I saw them or thought of their words.

More entries: shipshape, A slide catch?!, gothic movie, a piece of music, Fault? (2)

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08:16 AM Jul 05 2011

Yu Chen

Yu Chen
Taiwan

Thank you, Frank. Understanding and encouragement are what I need, now. I'll do some thing to fix my friendship after those bad emotions passed. Smile

07:45 AM Jul 05 2011

frank辛

frank辛
China

hi dee! sorry to hear that you feel blue. As far as i am concerned, all parents love thir children and they just show their love in different ways , some visible while some not. observe and you will find your parents love you as much as your sister. surely, it is sad to be misunderstood. i know your feeling.  maybe your friend missed you too much and didn't find good words to have it felt by you! calm down and have a good talk with her, either by e-mail or on phone. i guess it is likely to make a difference. hope you will get out of it soon