English, baby!

Honeymoon. Period.

Date: Nov 16 2007

Intro

1. Learn Vocabulary - Learn some new vocabulary before you start the lesson.

2. Read and Prepare - Read the introduction and prepare to hear the audio.

In the United States, on your wedding day you say, “Till death do us part,” meaning that you will love that person until you die. But more than half of marriages here end in divorce. What happens after the wedding day to make things fall apart?

This was a popular forum topic recently. Listen to Marni and Devan talk about what they think happens to love after marriage.

Dialog

1. Listen and Read - Listen to the audio and read the dialog at the same time.

2. Study - Read the dialog again to see how the vocab words are used.

Marni

Devan

Marni: You know, you’re in a relationship, especially, I think, if you get married, it’s like, you’re seeing someone, or you’re married, you’re in this relationship, you’re so in love and after a while…do you think…it just seems like…things…kind of…fizzle.

Devan: That’s why I’m afraid to get married.

Marni: I know! It seems like…what happens when that happens? And does it? There’s that expression, “The honeymoon phase” of a relationship. At first you’re all excited but then…I don’t know…you just get so complacent.

Devan: Do you think that it’s because they’re not in love anymore or they’re just comfortable? Do think it becomes more comfortable and less passionate?

Marni: I think love changes. I mean, I think that part of being in a really good relationship is being comfortable with the fact that you’re not, like, super hot and heavy and all excited, you know, about each other. But then I also think, like, well, wow, so many people I know cheat on…you know, you hear about that all the time. Is that because love fades? Or is it just the excitement of something new?

Devan: I think it’s kind of both.

Marni: It’s kind of depressing, isn’t it?

Devan: It is kind of depressing. I don’t think I’m ever gonna get married. I want to stay in the honeymoon phase forever.

Marni: Yeah. Exactly. It’s not possible.

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Discussion

It takes a minute for Marni to get around to saying the sad truth. That so often, love fades after marriage. Devan says that that’s why marriage scares her.

People talk about the honeymoon phase of a relationship. A honeymoon is a vacation taken after a wedding. It’s worry-free, but temporary. A lot of times, relationships are like that too. They’re fun for a while, but the fun ends.

Devan wonders if love actually disappears after a while or if it merely seems to because people just get more comfortable with each other.

Marni says that she thinks love changes. That part of what it means to be in a lasting relationship is accepting that it may not be extremely passionate all the time.

But, nonetheless, many people in seemingly happy relationships choose to cheat. It may be the attraction of something new, or it may be the disappearance of love. Or both.

Why do you think love often seems to disappear after a while? What’s the best way to keep a relationship passionate?

Comments

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laker yan

China

i am single,i don’t know why this kind of thing happens all the time, seems like every married person involved the same situation.

uaeladybird

Tanzania, United Republic Of

marriage is to build new life with new experience.. it is normal if the couple faced problems in the beginning, because each one has different personality. But by the time they will know each other more than before and in some cases one of them must sacrifice to let life goes appropriately.. i think the wife is the most sufficient person who can put most of things under control.

289339358

China

i want to get married with my gf!but she dont agree,because now i dont afford to buy a house!she wanna have a our own house in suzhou !we have falled in love with each other for four years!in fact i think that it is important not marriage but process!

jed liu

China

That's really a forum. Love is exist, when men and women love each other then married, maybe have a nice honeymoon. After that it should be quiet living, one have to responsible to the other.

goodmufty@yahoo.com

Ghana

hello,

i am mufty from west africa ghana and i will lilke to join.

LUCERN

China

After several years of marriage, I begin to regret that I got married and to belive in a saying that no one could meet all emotional demands of another person.

Rella Xu

China

Hi,Steelheart,I can't agree with you any more.I also like the sentence you stated:"True love lies in the heart. It is like an ocean wave, sometime high sometime low."

Just enjoy the life,life is wonderful!

sunny101

China

thank u

vijaysekar

India

Both must try to adjust each other in all kinds of situations. If one get angry in any situation, another have to try to solve the problem if it arises. Both should not get angry.

acc06140709

Taiwan

I think that getting marriage need lots of courage.

after married ,evevything gets boring.but relationship between wife and husband needs to hold together by them. after all they got the same decision and faith to each other.

ancyjohn

India

It's all rubbish. Real love is love without any reason. And I believe in that. It is not a way of fun. so we cant say it is boring. both parners must try to adjust with each other in all kinds of situations.

Steelheart

Indonesia

I believe that true love will never end. In the life, a man can be bored, it is natural. It depends on how to handle it. In he honeymoon phase, everyhing is seen to be happy, fun, it is because a man experience the first experience in his life. True love lies in the heart. It is like an ocean wave, sometime high sometime low. Enjoy the life.

licxshelley

China

I get married,but I don't know how to keep the relationship. we work in the same place ,but my husband is always so busy,we seldom get together , i am bored about that.

passerby

China

i don't know.because i havn't married.

maybe like someone said.

i want to marry

gongxue1986115

China

i 'm not fall in love ,so i don;t understand the meaning of love relathionship .but the most important point is two people 'life need considerate and understant each other .

Cayra

Dominican Republic

Hehehe.. I liked this lesson. Even we all want to live in the "honeymoon phase", i guess is kind of impossible.

I think Love itself, don't dissapear, i mean, the couple just get into a routine, and all that stuff, like Sweet Liza said. Like Complacent.

If we find that person that make our heart beat fastest, and we decide to get married, make that experience fun, different, using our inventive, to renovate that love each day.

Create an aventure of the marriage, and enjoy each things that make u fall in love with that "someone"....

Even of that "depressing" perspective of the marriage in the lesson, i keep the faith to find someone who never change after marriage and make our love bigger each day! (yeah, right!) :P

♥peace!

puppys2black

Philippines

sometimes we dont understand about love could happen.we just keep good relationship so love will be long lasting forever.keep a relationship passionate and try to do different things,surprising in order to the couple not to get bored.

keep merriages happy and enjoy the wonderful honeymoon….........